Dear Why,
Realizing that you don't want to feel like this is a step in the right direction. I'm sorry that you are going through a rough spell right now but I know from personal experience that can change for the better. Just a suggestion and I do this myself when I go to the Endo and it keeps him on his toes... haha...I write down all the questions that I have for him ....wait...actually I type them on the computer, I number it and then I print out two copies with one for him and one for me. This way I can ask him questions and it's just easier to do this by looking at the paper.
A lot of feeling blue comes from the hormone fluctuation itself and that will change over time. You will be able to recognize it and I think that helps too (smile) I used to cry for no apparent reason and sometimes I still do! but I collect myself and kidda giggle that my hormones must be fighting it out with themselves and this to shall pass.
You asked why do I have to have CAH ? I do believe God doesn't give us anything we can't handle. Here is something else to consider that helped me...you see ...eventually everyone has some sort of problem for example diabetes,thyroid, eye glasses and well you get the picture...it's just some of us have things happen sooner than others. CAH happens to be on of those things except of course Late-Onset CAH.
I went to the the local hospital for some out-patient surgery and these kids...sorry....teenagers were there in a volunteering capacity. Would you be interested in something like that or maybe volunteering at a local library or something else. See my point is that if you are doing something that maybe you might forget about the CAH for awhile and then you are able to see what you can do in life. This idea works for me, I'm always doing stuff and CAH does slip down the level of importance in my life. I'm to excited about trying things to be upset about CAH that nobody had any control over anyway.
Another thing that always helps is going for a walk. Do you have a dog ? Take him or her with you! Animals are great listeners and they always agree. I've felt miserable about CAH but the cat and the horses don't care so why should I? Remember, even a beautiful vase has a flaw somewhere (smile) but really is it a flaw ? I bet that you have never looked at yourself and realized how strong you really are ! I bet there are so many good qualities about yourself that you don't see but other people naturally do. I know it's hard to talk with parents but maybe you can pick a time to try ?
Everyone is here on earth for a reason and everything that someone does counts. You have so much to offer and give to the world! You just have to see that in yourself! Maybe, if you got your questions answered about CAH then just perhaps you might feel better.
Take care of yourself,
Aimee
